What is it about a fairy tale that makes grown women get up at four o’clock in the morning on a Friday and drink hot tea and ooh and ahh like they are teenagers? It is simply how we were created. And Friday’s fairy tale wedding did not disappoint. It held all the beauty, regalness and elegance that we hoped for. It had horse drawn carriages, and men in uniform, and amazing hats, (Please someone help hats come back in style around here!) it had beautiful music and a grand cathedral and an exquisite bride and a charming groom. And the kiss…oh, we loved the kiss, both of them.

But do you know what it was that touched me more than anything? It was the realness, and truth with which they were charged. It was the one honest moment of the entire royal wedding of William and Kate that struck me most. It was in the middle. Between ten foot wedding gown train entrances and prepubescent boys singing like angels that the words struck me to my core. Maybe it is because I’ve walked through the painful heartbreak of divorce that I heard it. Or maybe it is because of my age that it struck me with such clarity and fell on ripe ears, but for whatever reason, all I could think was, “I hope that young couple is listening…truly listening.”

It was when The Bishop of London got up to speak while the young couple sat in chairs across from him. He said,

“Marriage is intended to help man and woman become what God intended them to be… You have chosen to be married in the site of a generous God who so loved us that he gave himself to us in the person of e Christ. And in this generous spirit husband and wife are supposed to give themselves to each other. Faithful and committed relationships offer a door into spiritual life into which we discover the more we give of self, the richer we become in soul…in marriage we are seeking to bring each other into fuller life. IT is however hard to bring ourselves from self-centeredness, but for the hope to be fulfilled, it is necessary for the solemn commitment to be made, that whatever the difficulties we are committed to generous love…(My favorite part) Marriage should transform as husband and wife make one another their work of art. It is possible to transform so long as we don’t harbor ambitions to reform our partners. There must be no coercion of the spirit is to flow. Each must give the other space and freedom…As the reality of God has faded from so many lives in the west, there has been a corresponding inflation of expectations that personal relationship alone will supply meaning and happiness in life. This is to load our partner with too great a burden. We are all incomplete. We all need a love that is secure instead of oppressive. We need mutual forgiveness in order to thrive. But as we move towrard our partner in love, following the example of Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit is quickened within us and can fill our life with light.”

Oh my…what words for any of us in marriage or deep relationships of any kind to head.

Relationships are a gift- a gift to help us become all that God created us to be.

We have them because God is so generously kind.

They should transform us, but not be about us trying to reform one another.

And no relationship should be expected to supply our meaning or happiness. That is something that God alone can do.

Love is not oppressive- but secure.

Love needs mutual forgiveness to thrive.

And when we move toward other people with hearts of love, we are a true reflection of Jesus Christ.

I bet when you take off the fancy hats, diamond tiara’s, medals and ascots. When you clean the horse’s residue from the streets and all the makeup of the day has come off, you will simply be left with two hearts learning how to love each other. May they watch their wedding video over and over and over…(we sure have had ample opportunity. I think Bravo is still airing it.) And may they remember the words of that precious Bishop In fact, may we too…

Any thoughts that it stirred in you we’d love you to share…

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