I’m discovering how much of life is lived as a performance. How very few people actually engage life on a soul level. Think about it, we introduce most people by what they do. As if just being us separate of what we do isn’t enough. I came to the revelation a couple weeks ago that I spent years performing. I would have never labeled it as that. But I realized that is exactly what I was doing. I realized for me it came from a place of survival. I had to survive. And performing through life was the only way I knew to do that. So, I wrapped myself up in an image. An image that looked a certain way, often talked a certain way, and performed a certain way. Granted, there was a genuine thread of me that always ran through that. I loved people well. Truly loved them. But giving was much easier than receiving.

And what I realized is that when we live a life based on performance, we aren’t living. Not living the true design God created us to live. We are living a poor shell of existence that offers nothing of the genuine beauty of who God is. God has designed us indescribably alive. And to perform is to shut down our heart in such a way that it isn’t connected to Him. It is connected to what we think about Him. What we desire Him to see in us. How we desire Him to be pleased with us. But not connected to how deeply He loves us.

It is imperative for true survival, for true connection to our hearts to rid ourselves of performance. I may have survived for a season on performing, but trust me, there came a moment when all of it shattered and I was left with nothing but a pile of ruins. But once I began to dig out of them, I realized that the only way I could ever live, would ever live again, is in a transparent, raw, true state of living. That the “people pleaser” in me had to die. That I had to be okay if my saying “no” hurt someone’s feelings. That I had to be okay if people knew I didn’t have all my crap together. Yep, I just said crap. Part of being my authentic self.

And do you know what I discovered? People were drawn to that. Craved it. Were desperate for it. That’s why people are leaving the “manufactured” church for churches that are authentic and transparent. People can do performance themselves, they don’t need to come to church on Sunday morning and get more. We pay Hollywood and Broadway for that. Surely God must have something of far more value than both.

What are you losing by performing? What piece of the very soul of you are you shutting down that God created in you to be alive? I dare you to discover it. I dare you to lay aside the facade of what you want people to see, and allow your heart to live the life God created it to be. You will be amazed how people will flock to that. They are desperate for it. They are desperate for the real you.